Refrigerator
Found On: Anchorage Craigslist
Older model side-by-side, fridge side does not work , it would be good for a smoker or maybe taking it out and shooting it somewhere.
The free classifieds can get hard-boiled.
Fridge – “It sure is nice of you to take me out to the country. It’s been awhile since I’ve been in the fresh air.”
You – “What? Oh yeah, no problem. Glad to help, you’ll like it. Real peaceful.”
Fridge – “Where are we going exactly?”
You – “Oh, someplace nice. Real nice. Down by a stream, out at the edge of the county.”
Fridge – “Why are we doing this again?”
You – “Well, like you said, nice to get some fresh air. We can catch up. Talk. You know.”
Fridge – “So you’re not angry anymore? About blowing my motor? The venison going bad?”
You – “Me? Noooo. Coulda happened to any fridge. Not your fault. You’re just old. With a bad motor. Hey look, we’re here. Let me unload you.”
Fridge – “Thanks. Oh yeah, that’s more like it. Hey, why are you getting your rifle off the rack? We going to hunt?”
You – “Maybe.” [walks a few steps back, points gun at fridge]
Fridge – “Hey, now wait a minute! You said you weren’t angry! You said it coulda been any fridge!”
You – “Yeah, but it wasn’t any fridge, it was you. . . . The one fridge I trusted.”
Fridge – “Aww, come on . . .”
*fires*
“good for a smoker,” eh? Forcing someone to stand in a refrigerator while lighting up is an extreme measure to go to in order to control smoke stink. I guess they never saw the very special “Punky Brewster” episode where Cheri hid in the old refrigerator and got trapped and almost died.
Er, I’m pretty sure by “smoker” they meant “a device that one uses to smoke meats.” http://www.ehow.com/how_2205241_refrigerator-smoker.html
Actually I know people who use old fridges usually with targets to throw for shooting. Heat and rain ruin the targets, if they are left in the fridge, the targets do not warp(not sure exactly why as I assume it would be hotter)
Great dialogue there
If they meant “meat smoker”, they probably should have thought about how they were phrasing the description. I actually drew a complete blank when trying to come up with how to interact a broken refrigerator with a cigarette smoker.
Also, thought you were heading for “Of Mice and Men” with that dialogue.
The dialogue is crude… man! so crude!!! hahahahaha
and yes I must say I also thought that you could prevent someone from smoking another cigarrette by giving them this new “smoking booth”, just step in, close the door and you are sure not to smoke ever again…
What is it about backwoods communities (I lived in Anchorage, i can talk about it like that) and their need to shoot appliances? Seems like every time I go for a hike in a redneck town there’s a tv or fridge or car all shot up and looking like crap.
LOL
It would be especially great as a smoker (of meats) since it is from the 80’s and is completely lined in plastic! Imagine how good your turkey would taste after being smoked in carcinogen (and god knows what else) causing plastic fumes. What flavor!! Maybe Jeffrey Dahmer would’ve gotten some good use out of it (?). BTW, if you are going to use a frig as a smoker, get an old metal lined one–unless you like the name Zippy for one (or all) of your kids!