Time Out Doll
I have a really cute:
Time Out Doll
3 ft tall (approximately the size of a 2 year old child).
This doll has no face. Can be either a boy or a girl. Has Auburn curls.
Has a stuffed frog hanging out of back right pocket.
It can be placed in a corner as a time out child and can be displayed inside or out.
NOTE: Clothes on child come with some very light stains on it.
I am asking $25 for it.
(Cash only with exact change please.)
“Hi, I’m selling a nightmare I had about two weeks ago. It involved a doll. Without a face. Want it? I’ll throw in other subconscious fears for the right price.”
I have no idea why this exists. To show other children you must be obeyed? To terrify them into thinking they, too, may one day be subjected to a 6-week-long, day-and-night “timeout”? To lure compassionate adults to tap the motionless child on the shoulder, only to be startled when they learn it’s not a child, but some sort of decoy, by which time you’ve stolen their wallets?
Dunno. All I know is that a doll that has no face is going to have real trouble selling as “cute.”
I see dozens of these, every summer, at car shows. I loathe and mistrust them, but I see them.
These things creep me the fuck out. A few years ago, I visited my best friend from high school when he was staying at his parents over Christmas. Instead of a Christmas tree, his mom had about thirty of these in the corner of their living room. I almost died of sheer horror, then told him he could sleep on my parents couch. I guess she collects them or something, but that’s fucked up.
It’s still not quite as bad as that life-size creepy grandma doll.
I see these a lot at classic car shows for reasons I cannot fathom. Does anyone know?
The fact that it has ‘very light stains’ concerns me. I don’t want my timeout doll to have been previously loved and adored.
and we all know what the “very light stains” are.
It’s probably its grandchild, um, doll. Is it a doll? Are you very very sure?
It’s the stains that are really giving me the creeps…
That right there is one of the creepiest things I’ve ever seen. Who would even think to make something like that?? *shudder*
@Steve
my first thought was pedophile bait.
That isn’t creepy at all… people use it at car shows all the time. If you think that is creepy in any way you have some very serious troubles. I will, however, say that the life size grandma ‘doll’ isn’t something a normal person would have just lying around their house.
Well, I for one feel permanent time out is appropriate punishment for getting stains on one’s clothes when one has been warned repeatedly to be careful, and I mean it.
oh……….rocky!!@Steve
would this thing help me to haul ass in the carpool lane??
@paul weging
Only if you bought it a carseat, otherwise you’d probably get pulled over
“This doll has no face. Can be either a boy or a girl.”
I know of no other Craigslist poster who has demonstrated so neatly an ability to write slogans for horror-movie posters.
Oh, God, these things are ubiquitous among a certain variety of Christian conservative women over 60. They seem to think they’re cute and wholesome.
These are quite popular among middle-aged housewives. My mother has one.
Hers, however, does not have any stains on it.
These always remind me of that last scene in the Blair Witch Project.
Creepy yes..and I’m trying to wrap my head around WTF these things should be so popular at car shows. The first pic looks like the child is assuming the frisk position on the car to me.
I got no problem with sending a misbehaving child to time-out..but what sort of parent gets off on having a permanent kid-in-punishment gracing their home?
I can think of a thousand pranks involving this doll.
I was working for my parents at a craft fair several years ago and was sitting for two days facing a booth selling these. There were like 30 of them. It was the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen.
totally could be a petrified midget.
a buff petrified midget.
hahahaha
…and why do they seem to appear at car shows as noted in several comments above???? that seems even more random and strange.
OMG. There’s more of them!
http://www.janespoutytimeoutdolls.com/
I’ve seen them at car shows too! I don’t understand why, though.
@BobDole
What do you mean, “use it” at car shows? Use it for what? And why is it particular to car shows?
i have one of these! it was my grandmas. we always called it creapy doll. when she died i asked if i could have it! my family thinks i’m nuts for taking it. some time i forget i have it and it scares the shit out of me!
“Hey, Junior. Is that a frog in your pocket or…”
I love the photo but it would’ve been cuter if they’d shoved him farther up under the wheel well. Or closed his hands in the trunk and went for a drive. Or slid him part way under a parked car. Or put him face down in a puddle of cranberry juice in the middle of the street. Or floated him on his belly in a water hazard at the local golf course. Or propped him against the concrete divider on a busy freeway. And, if all else fails, there’s always car shows…
@Cindy B
Hahahaha, that’s it!!
How. The. Frell. Do they use these dolls at car shows? Do they put them under the rear wheels or something?
AAAAA
I clicked on that link.
I went to this link:
http://www.janespoutytimeoutdolls.com/bikerdolls.html
There’s one with leather chaps and boobs. And it’s sold. Already.
BOOBS IT HAS BOOBS THIS MEANS YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO SEE IT FROM THE FRONT OR THE SIDE WHERE ITS LACK OF A FACE WILL BE OBVIOUS AAAAA
PLUS IT’S A KID WITH BOOBS
These dolls do have faces, not so creepy. it is ot a child in this case but a miniture biker chick for decoration. different strokes for different folks, some of the comments are hilarious, although uneducated.
Could use it for the front of your priest costume.
Put them under the hood, aus you can see (same link). *smack*
Aargh!
http://www.janespoutytimeoutdolls.com/sitebuilder/images/no-146×262.jpg
You have a picture featured on peopleofwalmart.com, don’t you?
@Kit
That was the first category I looked at. They look like they’re all in a biker club for midgets.
@Mr Evilwrench
OMG that made me laugh so hard! Thank you, Mr Evilwrench!
I knew a guy that worked at a furniture store that sold a bunch of stuff like this. One day he picked one up, went in to the break room, came running out in to an area where customers are, faked a stumble and let the “kid” fly out and hit the floor. The look on customer faces was priceless. Oddly, he didn’t get in trouble for it, but he didn’t look like he worked there so people probably just figured he was just some punk in the store.
http://www.janespoutytimeoutdolls.com/africanamericandolls.html
So why are the African American dolls the only ones that carry weapons?
I noticed there is a ganster( white) doll holding a machine gun.and a white hunter,and a davy crocket, he was white right?
My cousin gave this to my grandmother for Christmas one year, only it’s a girl doll with a dress. She though it was “adorable!”
My mom has two of these, and damned if I know why. Her friends think they are SO CUTE, so mom gets them more from the Christmas Tree Shop. Some of her sisters have requested them now, too. My brother and I think that she’s crazy. All mom does is point and laugh at them, so maybe it’s repressed frustration at us? Transferred onto the dolls? Hmm, must ponder this.
“Adorable!” – Grandma-speak for “crap”.
I have two of these. Both were given to me by my mom. LOL One is “Max” and the other is “Jack”. Not creepy to me but totally useless. Maybe they’ll be good for Halloween this year…put them by a tree with some stickmen for a Blair Witch Project theme.
My grandma has two of these. (Or better worded, had. Other got torn up) My aunt made them. They are… Creepy space wastes.
Weapons? Of massdestruction?
And one even has a cap with “coke” on it!
I guess it’s the new Cabbage Patch Doll? But I don’t get the connection with car shows???
well some of them stand with a rag in one hand polishing the car. like a LIL helper, just cute thats all. some are under the hood with wrenchs like daddys lil helper. you people crack me up.you all do have an imagaination, you just need to broaden it, with a clean mind.LOL
Hi from Germany. We have those here, too, and I too find them creepy. But I always saw them as kids playing hide and seek. This “time out” thing is rather cruel (not to mention the icky ‘light stains’)…
And I also would love to know the connection to car shows? “I touched Daddy’s new car, it now has a fingerprint on the door, I’m a bad, bad child”?
I’m completely confused by the “Jane’s Pouty Timeout Dolls” website. How the FRACK do you “pout” without a FACE?
Am I the only person completely freaked by the facelessness? With a face, they’d just be, well, the kind of lame crap people’s grandma’s think is adorable. But without a face…Ew.
I also don’t understand the connection to car shows, with the possible exception that maybe a lot of guys who show stuff at car shows are married to the kind of woman that thinks these are adorable…that’s the only connection I can make.
They do have faces. quit saying they don’t, maybe not all of them do but the ones on this particular site do. The connection with the car shows, is…. they are supposed to be helping work on the car, or cleaning it, or sitting in the seat etc etc. just a prop thats all. but really cute, and most MEN>>> think they are too.
how about taking one to a carshow and rolling over it. and scream hysterically, OH NO I RAN OVER TIMMY!!!!
@Kit
Hahah holy crap, that was hilarious.
I’m with everybody else who doesn’t get the “car shows” remark.